A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Caskie Stinnett

An accountant is a man hired to explain that you didn't make the money you did.
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Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
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Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you
Fran Leibowitz

Save water shower with a friend.
;D
The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first divorce.
John Kenneth Galbraith

When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half.
Gracie Allen

A banker is a man who lends you an umbrella when the weather is fair and takes it away from you when it rains.
Mark Twain

Writing about Art is like Dancing about Architecture
hmm, it's maybe so interesting to learn it